Motherhood

So about 8 months ago I said I was going to post regularly...it didn't happen. What did happen is I gave birth to a beautiful and cheerful boy. He takes more energy then I had expected.
I have learned there are women out there that seem to be able to have a baby, a career, and time to socialize without letting one seem to slip: But that is the extraordinary exception. I've had to come to terms that I am not one of those one in five million women who are the exception.
As soon as I set a goal to do something for myself or otherwise, something will come up: My son will have a bad night and need to be held almost all day, the house will be extra dirty or we'll need run to the store/doctor/whatever. I can not devote a day to be in a fantasy world to write fifteen to twenty pages. I have learned I must ignore the assumptions that since I am a full-time mother I must have loads of free time.
I have learned from a childhood of trying everything just enough, that while it aloud me to do a lot of things, I was never able to refine any one thing. In other words, I never devoted enough time to be a proficient. I don't want that to be true of being a mother and wife. If there is anything worth putting aside some of my other ambitions for (at least for a while) it is my family. It may be sad to say when people ask that I have not done more financially or in a field, but It is a choice. For me, I am a mother and I want to be one of the best despite the cost.

Safe in my hands,
Where the world can’t reach.
I hold you close to the soothing beat.

Sleep now, dear baby,
I’ll be the watch.
The sea will toss and turn,
But I will cradle you,
Until at you can swim.

Soon you will leave me,
To battles of your own.
For now, though,
Awake to a smile,
Dry your tears with my touch.